Friday, January 15, 2016

Can You Relate?

Even individuals that appear to be strong deal with pain, anger, hurt, rejection, and disappointment. We either actually learn how to effectively deal with these things or we do a good job of masking the struggles that we go through.

I consider myself a strong individual but I'm realizing that I do some things out of stubbornness and out of the need to prove that I'm strong. Many times, I refuse to be weak and give in to what I don't want to give in to.

I'm learning that in order to live a well balanced life one must communicate what they are feeling and deal with issues as they come along. For me I'm able to discern things very strongly and very quickly. Many times I just withdraw myself or remove myself from the situation if I feel that the energy isn't right.

I believe in being genuine, honest, and real. So, if something is not okay with me I react accordingly.
Truth is though, by the time I actually deal with the situation I break down and respond emotionally because many times I have avoided confronting the issue. Reacting to a situation is not the same as dealing with a situation. I find that I react to situations, but I don't deal with them. When I was younger that might be understandable. Now, I'm thirty years old and I have to be more mature in how I deal with situations.

As I grow, I'm working on dealing with situations with better communication and trying to express my feelings early. I think I'm doing pretty good in dealing with the passing of my mother. However, I know that there are feelings about that ordeal that need to be expressed to certain people in my life. Not that I need to go and seek them out.  However, if the opportunity presented itself I definitely need to express how I feel about certain things.

When you don't deal with things, the problems just grow bigger.  It may appear that everything is okay on the outside, but on the inside you are a mess. I write these thoughts because we are all human and we share the same struggles. It's good to know that we are not alone in our experiences and that everything is not always what it looks like.

"Strive For Excellence"




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2 comments:

  1. I can definitely relate, not having a good support system is one of the most common issues that we all deal with everyday. I use to wonder why I was delayed in understanding some things, but now I realize that it has a lot to do with not having good mentors in my life that I could go to, who could help me with life issues. It has really been a journey especially growing up without a male role model to talk to about these things, so I have had to learn through trial and error, which is not the best way to learn. I often counsel others and when they tell me what they have been through I find myself telling them that it's not their fault the way they were raise or the things that the were expose to, that shaped their inability to perform better than they do. I don't say this to excuse bad behavior,but it is the explanation for some behaviors that we sometimes develop. We all are products of the environment and learning how to renew our minds take daily work but it's worth it all. We can't change what we did not receive in our past but we can choose to work on being better in the future. I know without Jesus Christ in my life this task would be impossible for me. The time that I spend with the Lord and in his word everyday of my life, is what helps me make better life decision. Also putting forth the effort to associate with people that are likeminded is a great character builder, even though it's not always is easy to find people of a like mind. I never give up on me because I never give up on the Lord who keeps me focused. Having people to relate to is very therapeutic, only thing is we have to be careful of what others can relate to us about. I always strive to do and be better, Which requires a good relationship with the Lord or at least with someone who has a good relation with the Lord, who can help me to see things about myself that I need to see. I don't have a lot of people like that, so it requires me seeking the Lord for myself, about myself and what I feel or think about others. I'm learning that if I allow myself to listen to the Lord or to those who he puts in my path, I improve in perception about things and people. We all have hurts and emotions, we just deal with things differently. I thank you for sharing your blog, it is a blessing. We all should find a wholesome way of expressing ourselves. No one adjust to the death of a love one over night and that's a fact. May you continue to grow in grace and I pray that you realize growth is normal, which requires spiritual detoxing on a regular basis.I'm proud of you.
    May God continue to bless you
    MUCH, Love Dad

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