Wednesday, November 9, 2011

What If????

In life, we really have no closure when it comes to certain situations in our lives. I truly believe that our human feelings and emotions prevent us from obtaining closure. Ultimately, we are given two choices, either to accept the situation or resign from the situation. There is no in between. For example, many times when you lose a loved one there is no real feeling of closure. You come to accept that they are gone, or you refuse to accept that they are no longer in your life. Some may believe that forgiveness is closure. Nothing is really ever forgotten, no matter how much you may have forgiven a person. Even in a divorce or a breakup, there is no closure. You may wonder "what if". You accept the outcome by dealing with it and moving on. Moving on is evidence of accepting the situation. If, you hold on to something that is no longer present you are living in denial. Resigning from a situation is just the opposite of closure because you don't deal with the situation, you just give up. Many times when people are in compromising predicaments, rather than deal with the situation they just resign. Resigning doesn't provide a feeling of closure and it actually provides more questions regarding the situation. Accepting a circumstance does not mean that you will never think about that person or situation again. Resigning of course means that the situation will always be present because it hasn't been properly dealt with. With time, some situations get better. However, if presently confronted with that situation old memories, feelings, and emotions may arise. We seek closure in many ways such a starting new relationships, picking up new hobbies, or even going to therapy sessions. I feel that these things allow us to refocus our minds temporarily. Sometimes, we may find what we feel like is closure, but if you take a closer look you realize that you accepted the situation for what it was.

2 comments:

  1. Good to here from you,Closure to me is not having all the answers to my question,but rather having peace with my self.

    Dad

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  2. Naomi I agree with your father,that closure in a relationship requires peace about the situation.I believe closure is that if a love one last day on earth was today, I could really say that I had expressed, showed my love for that individual. Naomi that is why I do not put off requests off my loved ones and i try to spend time with them when ever possible because time is short and I donot want to regret not doing something that could have made them happy.

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